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Drunk in the Bathtub, Again.
Tales of a Working Class Trophy Wife
What we feel we have to solve is why the dregs have not dissolved.
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The new definition of cute
This is a puppy...a puppy that is a Frug, french bulldog and pug. It's the peanut butter cup of cute dogs.
The new definition of cute

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Because I am better at these things...damnit.

Jack Frost / Dane McGowan - an unknown
King Mob II - Jonathan Rhys Meyers
Ragged Robin - Lauren Ambrose
Boy - Rosario Dawson
Lord Fanny - Jaye Davidson
Mr. Six - James Spader
Jolly Roger - Jeri Ryan
Jim Crow - Mos Def
Mason Lang - Clive Owen
Takashi - Collin Chou
Helga - Vanessa Hudgens
Elfayed - Omar Sharif
Coyote - Evan Adams
Edith Manning - Tilda Swinton
Tom O'Bedlam - Ralph Fiennes
King Mob I - James Frain
Queen Mab / Beryl Wyndham - Milla Jovovich
The Marquis de Sade - Alejandro Jodorowsky
Sir Miles Delacourt - Colin Firth
Orlando - Peter O'Toole
Miss Dwyer - Isabel Adjani
John-A-Dreams - John Malkovich
Harelquin / the Yellow King - Adan Jodorowsky
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Fortitude 1
Originally uploaded by psymonetta

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We're building a fort.
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Originally uploaded by psymonetta
But, where does it lead?
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7:21 AM: The neighbors are hammering. Usually, they're just hammered.

I have the day off work.
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I forget to look at my astrological chart every now and then. It's often nice to get in that headspace that allows a person to be a bit hypersensitive to the movement of the planets. That and, I always get this way around meteor shower time for some reason. In my chart, I love the initial juxtaposition of Pisces and Capricorn. It's nice being emotionally and cognitively binary. But, it's not so much of an on/off or this/that as simultaneously processing information in multiple ways. I'm thinking and emoting and suppressing it all at the same time. I think it's a bit too much for most people. It's like they can see the wheels rapidly turning, yet nothing comes out.

Name: Psymonetta Isnoful
February 23 1974
6:16 AM

Rising Sign is in 24 Degrees Capricorn
You are practical and reserved but very ambitious. An achiever and a hard worker, you respect success. Older looking and very serious as a youth, things lighten up and you relax more as you mature. You have a serious view of the world as being a difficult place to be in. Very envious of those who seem to have an easier life than you have, relaxation and play do not come easily. It is important that you had abundant parental support as a child so that you do not feel lonely and isolated as an adult. Generally, you have a good, earthy sense of humor that can carry you through when times really do get tough. You are purposeful, self-willed, industrious, realistic and responsible.

Sun is in 04 Degrees Pisces.
Extremely sensitive and emotional, you absorb the emotions of others (whether positive or negative) like a sponge. Emotionally vulnerable, you are easily upset and tend to cry readily. You are at your best when you can structure your environment in such a way that you are surrounded by positive, upbeat people. You are very helpful and understanding of the needs of others. Indeed, at times this can be a disadvantage, because you can be a sucker for anyone who needs help. Shy, dreamy, romantic in nature, you delight in retreating into your private fantasy world. Just be careful that you do not get lost in it! Trust your intuitions -- you may be quite psychic.

Moon is in 19 Degrees Pisces.
You have strong feelings and are extremely sensitive. It would help if you had a thicker skin -- you tend to react emotionally to every situation you come across. Kind, gentle and considerate of the feelings of others, you are good at taking care of the sick, wounded and helpless. But you tend to absorb the energy of others -- so avoid those who are always negative. You have a rich, creative and lively imagination, but you should be careful not to spend all your time daydreaming. Very intuitive, you have good ESP and may be quite clairvoyant or psychic. Remember that you too have the right to get what you want from life. If you are always defensive and kowtowing to others, people will take advantage of you and exploit you.

Mercury is in 07 Degrees Pisces.
Your ideas and thought processes do not come to you in an orderly, logical fashion. Instead, you think with your feelings or with images produced by your rich and fertile imagination. A very subjective person, your dreams and fantasies are very important to you. You trust your intuitions and tend to reject ideas that are based solely on logic. Very impressionable, you are sensitive to the moods and emotional states of those with whom you come into contact.

Venus is in 27 Degrees Capricorn.
You tend to keep your feelings under control -- emotions are only released in serious or important situations. You are distrustful of others whose behavior could be judged excessive or immoderate. As such, you prefer to relate only to those who are older than you or to those whose position is such that respect and duty are more important for both of you than passion or emotional response. Be careful, however, of relationships that are merely based on practicality or utility or you will ultimately be lonely.

Mars is in 27 Degrees Taurus.
Careful, slow and thorough about all that you do, at times you are also willful and stubborn when others try to alter your course. You are definitely not a quitter -- you will work long and hard to get what you want. Your possessions are very important to you. One of your continuing problems is that you tend to regard the significant people in your life much the same way as you do your possessions -- you become overly attached and much too jealous. You repress your anger when you get upset and that is not healthy. Try to learn to show your anger immediately in order to avoid painful explosions later.

Jupiter is in 26 Degrees Aquarius.
Your personal growth occurs when you have the freedom to do things in new and interesting ways -- this brings out your natural inventiveness. You are an individualist, but you are also attracted to mass movements that emphasize social betterment and you will devote much time and energy to their efforts. Very fair- minded and objective, you have extraordinary skills at organization and administration.

Saturn is in 27 Degrees Gemini.
You are such a clear thinker and speaker, with a logical orderly mind, that you are repulsed by abstract, intangible or unorganized thoughts or ideas. But you tend to get uptight about speaking in public because you are afraid to be wrong. Remember that the best way to learn is by making mistakes. Also, you will be so carefully prepared that you probably will not make many mistakes anyway. To be interesting to you, ideas have to be practical and useful.

Uranus is in 27 Degrees Libra.
You, as well as your entire peer group, have a very free, unstable and unconventional approach to relationships and emotional commitments. You will be attracted to experiments in marriage and shared lifestyles. Personal freedom is more important to you than entangling emotional bonds. In the realm of art and aesthetics, you are attracted to the bizarre, shocking and unusual.

Neptune is in 09 Degrees Sagittarius.
You, and your entire generation, are heavily involved in investigating and idealizing foreign and exotic intellectual systems and religious philosophies. The most extreme ideals will be pursued with gusto. You will be at the forefront of humanitarian attempts to improve the lot of those who are in need of assistance. You will be comfortable with the concept of the "global village."

Pluto is in 06 Degrees Libra.
For your entire generation, this is a time of radical changes in society's attitude toward marriage and interpersonal relationships. There is a general fear and awe at the power inherent in making emotional or contractual commitments -- they will not be entered into lightly.

N. Node is in 25 Degrees Sagittarius.
You will probably have many different contacts and acquaintances throughout your life. You're quite gregarious by nature and your natural curiosity about others lets you take the lead in forming new relationships. You'll form close ties with those who have similarly idealistic ideas -- especially those who can stimulate you intellectually in your chosen field of interest. Your enthusiasm for learning new things may also cause you to do quite a bit of traveling. Because you probably will have many wide-ranging interests and concerns, you most likely will have contacts and connections in various parts of the country (or world).
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I've always admired the sponge: a colony that is greater than the sum of its individual parts, that can be still, filter and absorb that which is nourishing from its environment, then spits it's semen into the current.


Sometimes, i feel like much more than the one creature that is observable on the surface. Do you know I am watching, filtering and absorbing?

My eyes are swimming. I'm also happy to be reminded that cryptic musings are meaningless unless you project them outward. I've been quietly spending far too much time amusing myself, as of late.

Four hours was not enough time for Paul Laffoley. Sometimes, I think I would gladly suffer Asperger's syndrome, just to possess that level of focus. High functioning autism is the wave of the future.
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You can't stop the dancing chicken.
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In case you're interested...this movie http://noreservationsmovie.warnerbros.com/

is a remake of this movie http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0246772/

So, if you'd rather see it in German, with better actors...
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I'm completely fascinated by this establishment on SE 41st and Raymond called the Busy Corner Grocery. It's basically a cafe, with an old grocery cold case from the fifties, table of produce and a couple of bookshelves with some dry goods. The cold case has mostly beer and wine, and a few dairy products. There are maybe a total of six or seven produce items at any given time, two of which are always lemons and tomatoes.

They serve fabulous coffee, and menu is limited to a cheese plate, a salami plate, three or four sandwiches, and whatever pasta dish or salad the proprietor feels like cooking/has the ingredients for that day. Their daughter is a fixture in the place and everyone knows her. Their dog hangs out in the doorway. They're never in a rush, and if you go there, go there to hang out because that's what the place is there for. It's not a "full service" restaurant. It's a place you can go to drink coffee or libations and a family will cook something up for you if you like. That's pretty much it. It's a very "slow food" sort of place.

This is all set up in a sort of classic looking general store style building. I love it there, and it's definitely the way I would want to do business if I were inclined to get into that sort of business again.
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gruyere soufflé
Originally uploaded by psymonetta
Here we have a gruyere and onion soufflé that I made to go with some baby salad greens from our garden. The arrangement in the background is a collection of oregano, lavender and vining roses from our yard.
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If you ever get the opportunity, go on the mine tour at the Ponderosa Saloon in Virginia City, Nevada. Be sure to ask for Steve.
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I'll guess I'll let you know what I cooked for dinner last night.

Gouda Cheese Soufflé
Roasted Asparagus

All washed down with Chardonnay from a box and chased with some ginger lemon cookies.

Also, my house blog was mentioned in the Oregonian a couple weeks ago. So, I've been playing with that a lot trying to keep the traffic satisfied.
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I'm considering...scratch that...I know I need to get a hexagram (not of the i ching variety) tattooed just below my rib cage, on the anterior right side on my body. My only issue is I can't decide how abstracted or involved I want the image to be.

Any suggestions are welcome in the pool of synthesis.

So far I have decided on these elements:

The triangles must be interlaced.

There should be some other visual element that distinguishes the image enough that it is not immediately considered a "Star of David". There are certain elements I am considering, but I will leave those to the imagination of the folks who know, for the sake of maintaining a little sanity here on the internets.

I would like the image to have a jewelry like quality...but be as simple as possible. If I could logically/literally/poetically link the image to include a pearl or pearls...that would be fantastic and everything would fall into place. Any references folks?
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Looks like I'll be in Chicago from March 7th through the 10th. I'll be staying on the loop.
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My Rolfer says I have too much energy tied up in my body and that I need to find a way to express it. He posits that the advanced training that I gave my muscles during the 6 year period when I was singing for 4-6 hours a day is still active and essentially being squashed back down instead of being expressed.

I'm not sure where to go with that. I do know that in my last session when he worked on my shoulders the opposite arm was involuntarily twitching and bouncing on the table as if it was getting electrical jolts.

Frodo is still hanging in there. He's a champion. We were pretty worried because he refused food for 4 days. But, he's back on the eating wagon, even though it's only a couple of spoonfuls of babyfood at a time. He's still happy to see us when we get home and even wants to play a little every now and then.

I'm supposed to reward myself for sticking to my diet for 12 weeks (and losing 10 lbs). But, I'm so tired and depressed that choosing a reward seems like some sort of ontological punishment. I want to go out...but I still feel too fat and socially akward. I want/need to buy clothes, but that seems futile while I'm losing weight so quickly plus I still feel fat. I'm getting my hair colored on the 20th, but that should just be part of my normal self-care plan.I want my dog to live and be healthy for another 40 years but no one seems to have that magic pill.
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Frodo, my hero

Frodo has not been feeling well over the course of the last week or so. We've had so many vet visits and ups and downs. He does have pancreatitis, but it got better and then worse, instead of steadily making progess toward being better.

Frodo, my hero
Monday, we checked him in to Dove Lewis NW for a series of blood tests and an ultra sound. He has a large mass filled with fluid growing on his stomach. This is what is putting pressure on his pancreas and causing it to be inflamed. Because he responded to the treatment for pancreatitis, instead of steadily getting worse, and because they found inflammatory cells in the fluid they sampled from the mass, it is likely that the mass is cancerous. The only option is exploratory surgery that may or may not help, and I don't want to put him through that at his age.

I love my guy. It's so hard to see him in pain. He has good moments, and then bad ones, and I just want to be with him every minute so I don't miss anything.

He saved us from the burglar last month. He's my hero, and my frisbee champion. He's been with me longer than any husband, boyfriend or friend I have ever had. He helped me get through college and made sure I always had a reason to come home at night. I don't know what I will do if he leaves me
Happy Frodo
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